Samsung’s 107.4 Trillion Won Quarterly Profit Too Large to Store on Any Device Except Samsung’s
The record figure, driven by demand for AI memory chips, now occupies 11 data centers and must be backed up nightly to a second, slightly smaller profit.
Artificial Intelligence
AI Industry Confirms It Has Used Up the Sun, the Moon, and Argon; Next Model to Be Named After Gravel
With Sol, Luna, Astra, and Argon now taken, the Continental Nomenclature Office estimates the industry has 11.4 months of usable nouns remaining.
Nvidia Reports $96.2 Billion Quarter; Analysts Ask Number to Hold Still So They Can Finish Reading It
The figure rose 106 percent from a year earlier and, by the Reporter’s measurement, another 0.41 percent during the time it took to read it aloud.
New Siri, Rebuilt on Google’s Gemini, Subcontracts Every Request and Invoices Users for Timers
In developer testing since Monday’s keynote, a single 10-minute pasta timer passed through four vendors and arrived with an itemized invoice for $0.00, payable within 30 days.