About The Continental Reporter

The Continental Reporter publishes news reports, columns, letters, and man-on-the-street panels about the nation, the world, and the cookout down the street. Wire copy is supplied by the Continental Press Service (CPS).

Editorial status

The Continental Reporter is a work of satire. Its articles, columns, letters, and panels are fiction. The people named in them, the quotations attributed to those people, the institutions they work for, and the events they describe are invented. Where a real public figure or event is the subject of a piece, everything attributed to it is exaggerated past the point of fact, and the speaking voices are our own fictional creations. Nothing published here should be relied upon as a factual report, as advice of any kind, or as a statement by any real person or organization. Please see the Satire Notice for the full statement.

The Reporter is not affiliated with any news organization, wire service, or government agency, real or otherwise.

Masthead

• Glenn Whitacre

  Senior National Correspondent

• Rick Halvorsen

  Columnist

• Constance Merriweather-Dunn

  Heritage and Values Columnist

• Lena Okafor

  Local Government Reporter

• Tom Brezinski

  Sports Writer

• Harriet Lowe

  Diplomatic Correspondent

• Martin Pugh

  Data and Polling Editor

• Evelyn Strand

  Standards Editor

• Continental Press Service

  Wire service

Standards

The Reporter’s standards are set out in a stylebook maintained by the Standards Desk. Errors are corrected on the Corrections page. Readers may respond to our coverage through Letters to the Editor.

Privacy

This site does not use cookies, analytics, advertising, trackers, or third-party scripts. It does not collect personal information. It does not know you were here, and it is not going to ask.